Destructive Behavior

It hasn't been a good day around here with my son.  He started out the morning being very agressive, wouldn't calm down, and was doing everything he could to push buttons.  I told my girls to ignore him and when they finally did, he didn't like it and socked one of them to get their attention.  It became a morning of just trying to dodge behaviors and keep them from getting hurt and so I told him he was going to have to go to his room.  He was just out of control and it didn't stop in his room either.  He screamed that we hated him, that he just wanted to be downstairs, that he didn't want to be in his room, that he was hungry (he had just eaten), that he had to go to the bathroom.  He's broken hangers in his room, but the biggest thing that happened today in his room was this.  This is hole #3.  He did it with his feet.  All because he's not getting his way.  He ran off from me last night when we were leaving neurofeedback therapy and starting kicking the pea gravel at me all because I told him that we were eating at home and we weren't going to Whataburger.  This is my kid that always has to be first or he retaliates, whenever he's hungry I'm supposed to just give it to him or he retaliates, he wants what he wants and he expects it or he retaliates.  The rules don't apply to him.  He does whatever he wants.  When I don't give in, he retaliates.  He retaliates a lot.  We've taken things away, given extra chores, put him in his room, losing out on priveleges, spankings (that's my last resort when nothing else has worked for multiple offenses)...it makes no difference.I have come very close to taking him to the children's hospital over the past couple of weeks.  However, we're still trying to see if neurofeedback is going to help him and he has an appt today and tomorrow to help gather that info and we see the psychiatrist on Thursday so I'm just trying to hang in there.  To say this day has been challenging is an understatement.  I wound up having to get my Father-in-Law to come over to help for a bit so I could regroup and I had another adult here in case he escalated further.  I hate days like this.  I hate the fact that he's only 6.  I hate the fact that he can't see that his actions have consequences...nope in his mind...this is just all my fault.  I hate to see that he is so full of anger.  I just wish he would learn to comply with rules and not hurt others.  He doesn't see how his behavior effects others at all.  No remorse for anybody that he hurts or anything that he damages.  He has to pay it back...yet he doesn't care enough to change the behavior.

Lord, help our children that struggle with destructive behavior to let go of their anger in a more positive way. Help us as parents to seek guidance from the Holy Spirit to know what to do in these instances too.  They can be so overwhelming at times.  Amen.